'(a festivus for the rest of us)

oniugnip: What can I get you for Christmas?
dramamamalama: I'd like world peace. And people say that they want world peace, but I really want world peace.
oniugnip: ... that's sort of a tall order. How about just worldwide nuclear disarmament?
dramamamalama: Well, that would be nice, but it's really the everyday killing that ticks me off. I'm not so much worried about the nukes.
oniugnip: I'll see what I can do about that.
dramamamalama: I think they have it at Toys R Us.