(no subject)

I carry around a lot of worries and anger and anxieties and insecurities. For some reason, driving up to San Francisco seems to set off a lot of them. I need to get over it. It's dumb and embarrassing.

Also I should figure out how to enjoy this cool concert I'm at now.

Also I have a failure mode where I can't get into a performance I'm at and I totally check out. It's not good and doesn't help the people I came with have fun. I've walked out of a few movies and just waited in the lobby for my friends.

I have trouble relaxing and enjoying art when I feel like the time could be better spent some other way. I just often don't spend my time very well when left to my own devices.

And whose fault is that, really?